I've been meaning to say this a lot lately so here goes - I wish I could take back nearly every guy I've kissed or slept with. It's killing me as to what I've done, it's made me who I am but I sometimes wish I wasn't that person. I have learnt from my mistakes and that's why I only want to take back about 3/4 of what I've done.
This is going to sound so gay but I wish I could of been pure for Joe. He is the one that means the most to me, someone has never meant this much to me. I look back on my relationships and think what the Fuck was wrong with me!! Why did I go out with who I did?!? It drives me mental!! I tell people how much Joe means to me and sometimes I feel as if they go 'yer whatever, you've been out and slept with heaps of guys, your just saying that.' But this is the truth, Joe means everything to me, he makes me smile, he makes me happy and is the first decent guy I've been out with!! He is amazing, caring, funny and nice and he always makes me feel fantastic!!
This is going to sound even weirder but I hope God forgives me for what I've done.
Back to school after a 4 day weekend :) yesterday included Joe coming over :) cuddles on my bed, on my floor and is funny when he give me a shoulder ride and goes "Your so light!!" and on Saturday I told him that I'm losing my belly and yesterday we were joking about it and as he was hugging me he says "Have you seriously lost weight?" as I must have felt skinner :) YAY I'm getting somewhere........ slowly :) He makes me so happy :)
Anyway Joe has been the 'new page/chapter/book' in life for me and I love it!!!!!!!!!!!
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